Having self-compassion is not the same as being selfish or self centred. Acknowledge your pain, your failure, your difficulty. It is part of the human journey. It will lessen, it will pass and it will teach...in time. What kindness would you give your friend suffering as you are now? Be that friend to yourself. If we cannot look after ourselves, we will not be strong enough to look after others.

Maysoon Zayid saying it as it is. Yes, she is inspirational for many reasons. She is also funny and self deprecating. Struggling with New Year resolutions? Well, if she can then I can can...

Sadly the celebrated poet, playwright, professor, memoirist, historian, director, screenwriter, activist and actress, Maya Angelou, died last Wednesday May 28 aged 86. Although particularly well-known for her poetry and memoir books, her fifty year plus career in a number of creative disciplines explains her wide influence today. Born Marguerite Johnson in 1928 in St. Louis, an unsettled childhood moved her between Missouri, Arkansas and eventually to San Francisco. Here during the 1950s as a dancer, singer and actress she changed her name to Maya Angelou. Her life up to age 17 is described in "I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings" her first book from 1969. By the time she wrote "I Know Why" she had already led a full life that included having met and been friends with Martin Luther King, Malcolm X, James Baldwin and Billie Holiday. Among her achievements and countless awards, she was also Bill Clinton's inaugural poet in 1993 - the first poet to recite at a presidential inauguration since Robert Frost at John F. Kennedy's in 1961. She was indeed a phenomenal woman. She may no longer be with us in body but her words, wisdom and inspiration will stay. How blessed are we to have such people in our lives?

After an extremely stressful week and a particularly horrible day I need to self soothe. My mind is racing and I'm struggling to quieten it so I'm going to focus on some art... I love the way mandalas seem to grow out of the page - from the seed. The music here is especially peaceful. I intend to let my mind wander and create what it feels like doing:-)

Time to Change is doing so much to reduce the stigma of mental illness. Even that term 'illness' jars with me. Sometimes it is our body’s reaction or defence mechanism to life events, what the wonderful Irvin Yalom calls 'life's givens' that causes us to shut down or self soothe in a potentially harmful way. Whatever, it is time to talk. Get the support you need and remember that most people will experience some form of mental health problem during their lifetime. Fight that stigma! 1 in 4 people will experience a mental health problem each year. (Mental Health Statistics, 2001)

When is the last time you did absolutely nothing for 10 whole minutes? Not texting, talking or even thinking? Mindfulness expert Andy Puddicombe describes the transformative power of doing just that: refreshing your mind for 10 minutes a day, simply by being mindful and experiencing the present moment. (No need for incense or sitting in uncomfortable positions.)

Ash Beckham: We're all hiding something. Let's find the courage to open up,

How caught up can we get in dramas - our own, other peoples? How many of us feel we are not living unless something is 'kicking off'? By creating disturbances I can test others out, get my adrenaline running, be at the centre or just start it off then retreat... My mind is busy thinking about what is going on - trying to predict, explain, justify, blame, deny... All this is hard, hard work and maybe, maybe I am avoiding asking for what I really want; really need. However, if I want peace and harmony I must first look to myself and my behaviour. What can I do to prevent disturbances? Can I assert myself in a non aggressive way - a different way? Different to that which doesn't seen to work?

Maybe because it is 'Black Friday' I just don't want to buy anything. The thought of the crowds sends me running in the opposite direction. And do I really need this stuff? Do I need to get more stuff just because it is Christmas? This year my family have agreed a £10 present limit on each person to open on the big day...and then we are going to plan a day out. I don't know what yet but we've decided shared experiences might be more fun and fulfilling than yet more stuff. Perhaps less bah humbug and more hey, ho than I thought

Why look after ourselves? Well, if we don't then we may not be there for others. We don't have to devote hours and hours but it's ok to be a little selfish, to take a little time, to allow ourselves a little of what we give to others. To keep mind and body together don't forget the basics - good nutritious food, sleep, exercise be it a short brisk walk or time in the gym, hug with family, friends or furry friend, time out reading or meditation... What would you recommend to a friend? Be a friend to yourself. Thanks to HealthyPlace.com

This made me smile and was also very humbling. Today it is 'Black Friday' and the news footage is full of people fighting for Christmas 'bargains' in Asda, Tesco and in America. What a contrast. Also reminds me a bit of when I've purchased expensive toys only for the box to be so much more interesting...