Have a listen to Penny Mallory and discover what mental toughness is and how it could transform your life. She asks us to imagine what would happen if we developed our mental toughness? Against all the odds, Penny Mallory made her childhood dream come true when she became the first woman in the world to compete in a World Rally Car for Ford in the World Rally Championship. She remains the only woman to have achieved this. Not bad considering she was teenage runaway and spent 3 years homeless in London. Penny attributes her success to having learned how to build and harness 'Mental Toughness'. She now teaches her Mental Toughness formula to help people develop confidence, resilience, commitment, determination and focus so that they can build powerful, successful teams and organisations. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community.

Within mental health and well-being, emotional resilience stands as a powerful shield that enables us to navigate through life's adversities with grace and strength. At Cosmos Counselling , I understand the significance of fostering emotional resilience so we can lead a fulfilling life despite the inevitable obstacles that come our way. Let's delve into the essence of emotional resilience and its transformative impact on our lives... Understanding Emotional Resilience Emotional resilience signifies our ability to adapt to stress, trauma and adversity without succumbing to despair. It is not about avoiding challenges but rather managing them with a realistic mindset and determination. Optimism: Seeing setbacks as temporary and maintaining a hopeful outlook. Adaptability: Embracing change and being flexible in the face of adversity. Self-Compassion: Treating oneself with kindness and understanding during tough times. Purpose: Finding meaning and motivation in challenges, leading to personal growth. The Journey Towards Emotional Resilience Cultivating emotional resilience is a path that requires self-reflection, practice, and support from others. It involves the development of healthy coping mechanisms, emotional regulation skills and a nurturing environment that fosters growth. Counselling and psychotherapy offers a safe space for individuals to explore their emotions, build resilience and unlock their inner strength. Therapy sessions aim to empower individuals to embrace challenges and realise they can be opportunities for growth and self-discovery. Embracing Resilience in Daily Life Mindfulness Practices: Engage in mindfulness meditation to stay present and reduce stress. Healthy Coping Mechanisms: Develop healthy ways to cope with stress, such as exercise or creative outlets. Seeking Support: Reach out to friends, family or professionals for guidance and encouragement. Self-Care Rituals: Prioritise self-care activities that rejuvenate your mind, body and spirit. The Triumph of Resilience To conclude, emotional resilience helps us navigate life's challenges. By embracing resilience, we not only overcome such difficulties but may also emerge stronger, wiser and more compassionate towards ourselves and others. Remember, resilience is not the absence of hardships but the courage to face them. User Insights: The Power of Emotional Resilience Site Activity Conclusion: The data gathered from our site activity reveals a growing interest in topics related to emotional well-being and resilience among our visitors, showcasing a genuine desire for personal growth and self-improvement. The blog post explores the profound impact of emotional resilience in conquering life's challenges and highlights the transformative journey towards holistic well-being. Through introspection, support and proactive steps, individuals can harness the power of resilience to thrive in the face of adversity. Counselling can assist in this journey if needed.

The School of Life has created another super short film all about our capacity to think - positive, neutral and negative thoughts as well as irrational and compulsive. It is estimated that some 70,000 separate thoughts hurry through our consciousness from the moment we wake up to the time we slip into sleep. To help us understand those thoughts The School of Life have produced five questions to direct our minds to areas which we tend to neglect and from where trouble can most intensely arise when we do so. Reflections before bed may just be a helpful beginning. FURTHER READING You can read more on this and other subjects in our articles, here: https://9qq0.short.gy/okh44o “Our minds are some of the busiest places in the known universe. It is estimated that, under a deceptively calm exterior, some 70,000 separate thoughts hurry through consciousness from the moment we wake up to the time we slip into sleep – some of these elaborate and sequential, many more fragmentary and sensory by nature. What these many thoughts have in common is that we seldom do them any kind of justice. The river of ideas and feelings is relentless, turbulent and chaotic. In a typical minute, we might briefly register that we are annoyed with a friend, then our minds are directed to a worry about a tax return, which is then quickly supplanted by the sighting of a raven, which makes us think of our grandmother, who evokes a trip we once took to Greece, which ushers in thoughts of some lip balm we need to purchase, which is then supplanted by a registering of a pain in our left knee, which is succeeded by a memory of a friend we lost touch with after university, which cedes to a recurring reflection on what kind of lamp we might invest in for the living room. And we might here still only be at the thirty second mark of what we casually call ‘thinking’ or just ‘gazing out of the window’…”

In today's fast-paced world, stress has become a common companion for many. We often find ourselves overwhelmed by the demands of daily life, juggling work, relationships and personal well-being. But what if I told you that all stress begins with one negative thought? Managing negative thoughts can be done. Understanding the Power of Thoughts Our thoughts have a profound impact on our emotions and actions. When we dwell on negative thoughts, it can lead to a downward spiral of stress and anxiety. Learning to manage and reframe these negative thoughts is key to maintaining a healthy and balanced mindset. Strategies for Negative Thought Management Take a moment to reflect on your thought patterns. Are there recurring themes that lead to stress? Recognising these patterns is the first step towards change. When a negative thought arises, challenge its validity. Ask yourself if there is evidence to support this thought or if there could be an alternative, more positive perspective. Mindfulness techniques, such as deep breathing or meditation, can help you stay present and break free from negative thought cycles. Focusing on the positive aspects of your life can shift your perspective and reduce the impact of negative thoughts. User Insights "All stress begins with one negative thought." This simple yet profound statement highlights the importance of our thought patterns in managing stress effectively. Conclusion By implementing these strategies and taking proactive steps to manage negative thoughts, you can cultivate a mindset that is resilient to stress. Remember, you have the power to shape your thoughts and, in turn, shape your reality. SEO Keywords: negative thought management Visit Cosmos Counselling in Liphook or more resources on stress management and well-being.

Missing someone hurts. It is normal but why does it hurt so much? Are we weak to feel this or is it a strength? The School of Life explains that missing someone that we’re close to – because they’ve had to go to another country, or are up in the north on a course, or went on a hiking trip with their friends – is such an unpleasant emotion and it feels peculiar to suggest that it is also, at a profound level, an extraordinary achievement and an important marker of emotional maturity. It is in no way simple for an archetypal adult to be able to miss anyone and we are often, almost without knowing it, engaged in complex manoeuvres to ensure that we resolutely won’t…

One of the most vital of all life skills is self soothing; the art of calming oneself down, restoring perspective and remembering to be kind to oneself. Too often, because we were never properly soothed by others as children, we have no idea how to soothe ourselves as adults. We need to learn the significance of soothing. Here the School of Life guides us in how to soothe ourselves and, in turn, others. FURTHER READING “It’s the middle of the night, let’s imagine, and we’ve been on the earth for about three months. A lot is still very unclear. We are profoundly helpless, barely able to move our own head and utterly at the mercy of others. The sources of our suffering and joy lie far outside our understanding. Hugely powerful needs pass through us at regular intervals and we have no way of making sense of them to ourselves – let alone of communicating them reliably to others…” On Soothing - The School of Life

Man looking out of window at various buildings. In today's fast-paced world, it's easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of constant activity, leading to a pervasive sense of exhaustion. We often wear our busyness like a badge of honour, believing that the more tasks we juggle, the more successful and fulfilled we must be. But what if this obsession with productivity is actually hindering our well-being rather than enhancing it? The Illusion of Productivity The constant need to feel busy can trap us in a cycle of fatigue and burnout. We equate being busy with being valuable, but in reality, this mindset can lead to a decline in mental and physical health. It's crucial to understand that true productivity isn't about how much we can cram into a day but rather how effectively we can manage our time and energy. Combatting the Exhaustion Epidemic 1. Prioritise Self-Care Embracing self-care practices is not a luxury but a necessity. Make time for activities that rejuvenate your mind and body, whether it's meditation, exercise or simply unplugging from technology. Remember, taking care of yourself is crucial for sustained productivity. 2. Practice Mindfulness The practice of mindfulness allows us to be fully present in the moment, reducing stress and promoting mental clarity. By focusing on the task at hand without distractions, we can accomplish more in less time while fostering a sense of calm. 3. Set Boundaries Learn to say no to tasks that don't align with your priorities. Setting boundaries is essential for preserving your energy and preventing overload. Remember, it's okay to decline opportunities that will only contribute to your sense of busyness. 4. Delegate and Collaborate Don't be afraid to ask for help when needed. Delegate tasks that can be handled by others and collaborate with colleagues to lighten your workload. Recognize that true efficiency often involves teamwork rather than sole responsibility. Breaking Free from the Cult of Busy It's time to challenge the pervasive narrative that equates busyness with worth. By re-evaluating our relationship with productivity and embracing a more balanced approach to life, we can break free from the shackles of exhaustion and reclaim our well-being. Let's strive not to glorify the hustle but to prioritize our health and happiness above all else. Remember, it's not about being constantly busy but about being purposeful in our actions and intentional in our pursuit of a fulfilling life. So, take a moment to breathe, to rest, and to reflect. Uncover the myth of exhaustion, break free from the cult of busy, and embrace a life that's truly enriching and sustainable. In the end, it's not about how much we do but how well we do it that truly matters. Let's redefine our relationship with busyness and choose vitality over exhaustion, purpose over perpetual motion.

People with their hands in the air. The summer months brings various activities with other people. Some with old friends and others rich with the possibility of making new friendships. In the journey of self-discovery and growth, there exists a powerful and invaluable force that often goes unrecognised but plays a vital role in our well-being - friendship. For all of us, the significance of fostering and nurturing friendships cannot be understated. Understanding the Essence of Friendship Friendship is not merely a bond between individuals; it is a cornerstone of emotional support and companionship. Good friends are like beacons in the stormy seas of life, providing solace, understanding and acceptance in times of joy and sorrow. During therapy, we can delve deep into our personal struggles and triumphs, but the impact of genuine friendships outside these walls can be equally profound. The Impact on Mental Well-being Research has shown that strong social connections can have a direct positive impact on our mental health. Engaging in meaningful friendships can reduce feelings of loneliness, improve self-esteem and serve as a buffer against stress and anxiety. Maintaining and nurturing our friendships can complement any professional support we receive and enhance our overall emotional wellness. Nurturing Friendships in the Digital Age In today's digital landscape, the definition of friendship has evolved. Social media platforms offer a convenient way to stay connected, but the quality of these interactions can often pale in comparison to face-to-face connections. It is essential to grow authentic relationships that go beyond virtual likes and comments. Engaging in meaningful conversations, sharing experiences and fostering trust are the pillars of lasting friendships that can enrich our lives. The Reciprocity of Friendship Reciprocity is essential in a healthy friendship which makes it very different to personal therapy. Being a good friend entails offering support, empathy, and understanding but also being willing to receive these gifts in return. It is crucial to understand the delicate balance of giving and receiving, and friendships provide a safe space to practice this. Conclusion: Embracing the Gift of Friendship As we navigate the complexities of our inner worlds, we cannot overlook the profound impact of friendship on our emotional well-being. Through the therapeutic relationship, we can explore growth and healing, and meaningful friendships can be a powerful complement to professional support. Let us cherish and nurture these connections that enrich our lives and remind us that we are never alone on this journey of self-discovery. After all, no man is an island. We all need each other. In conclusion, as we reflect on the value of friendship in our lives, let us embrace the gift of companionship, support and understanding that true friendships offer. Remember, in the tapestry of life, friends are the colourful threads that weave a personal beautiful story of resilience, love and connection.

None of us are going to get out of here alive. If we are lucky, we will live long and healthy lives. What can help us to achieve this? What we do know is having a purpose in life can help people maintain physical function and independence as they age. According to researchers from Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health, older adults who reported having goals for the future and a sense of meaning had better grip strength and walking speed than those who didn't. The reason why having a sense of purpose helps healthy aging isn't fully understood yet but it may be that those who have it take better care of their health, have better impulse control and engage in healthier activities than those who don't.

Going back into studying again - as a supervisor , this time - those imposter feelings were once more triggered. Looking around at my highly qualified and experienced colleagues, the self doubt began to appear. Despite recent comments that says, “ stop telling women they have imposter syndrome ” Sheaba Chacko has found a Hidden Truth about imposter syndrome’s roots as she works through her own baggage and helps her clients resolve theirs. Imposter syndrome is the by-product of having to project “ The Representative Self ” what we believe is approved of by society at the expense of rejecting “ The True Self. ” So instead of leaving a legacy, this duplicitous living lends to a litany of physical and mental health struggles. Sheaba's own personal experience with imposter syndrome has a universal message for all of us who live on the margins of mainstream life and has spent their lives trying to be what their culture defines as “normal”. Sheaba is a courageous speaker who knows how to inspire others with her own vulnerability. Known for making her own life choices, Sheaba rejected the typical South Indian career pathways of Engineering and Medicine to become a licensed professional counsellor. Despite the stigma associated with mental health, especially in communities of colour, she went on to open her private practice, Fearless Permission! This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organised by a local community.

I find this idea extremely interesting.  In a culture where the medical model is revered - the belief we need fixing because we are broken is a familiar goal.  Here, author and teacher Jeff Foster challenges the core myth of healing - that you should be healed 'by now'. Healing is not a destination, but a present-moment welcoming of all the 'guests' in awareness, a call to LOVE. Sadness, anger, fear, doubt, do not want to be healed, but held. What would happen if we learn to embrace and sit with our feelings? Filmed live at a meeting on 26th April 2015 in the Netherlands: http://www.lifewithoutacentre.com In a world that often rushes us from one emotion to the next, there is immense power in pausing to sit with our feelings. The idea that we need to fix ourselves constantly overlooks the beauty of simply being with our emotions until we are ready to accept them. It’s time to slow down, breathe, and explore the art of embracing our feelings fully. Understanding the Importance of Sitting with Our Feelings Emotions are an integral part of the human experience. They provide us with valuable insights into our inner world, guiding us through life's highs and lows. However, society's emphasis on instant solutions and quick fixes can hinder our ability to truly understand and process our emotions. By allowing ourselves to sit with our feelings, we create space for introspection and self-discovery. It is in these moments of stillness that we can unravel the complexities of our emotions, gaining a deeper understanding of ourselves in the process. The Healing Power of Acceptance Acceptance is a transformative force that emerges when we embrace our feelings without judgment or resistance. It is not about pushing away uncomfortable emotions but rather acknowledging them as a natural part of the human experience. When we accept our feelings, we grant ourselves the permission to be vulnerable and authentic. Through this vulnerability, we cultivate compassion towards ourselves and others, fostering deeper connections and emotional resilience. The Process of Sitting with Our Feelings Sitting with our feelings is an active process that requires patience and self-compassion. It involves acknowledging our emotions without trying to change or suppress them. Instead, we observe our feelings with curiosity and kindness, allowing them to surface and dissipate organically. During this process, it is essential to engage in self-care activities that nurture our emotional well-being. Whether it's journaling, meditating, or seeking support from loved ones, finding healthy outlets to express our feelings can facilitate the healing journey. Embracing Vulnerability and Growth Through the practice of sitting with our feelings, we embrace vulnerability as a strength rather than a weakness. Vulnerability opens the door to personal growth and self-empowerment, enabling us to confront our fears and insecurities with courage and grace. As we develop our sense of emotional resilience through sitting with our feelings, we create a greater capacity to navigate life's challenges with resilience and authenticity. Embracing our emotions becomes a transformative process that empowers us to lead more fulfilling and meaningful lives. In a culture that often prioritises productivity over self-reflection, the medical model over the therapeutic, the art of sitting with our feelings offers a powerful antidote to the noise and distractions of daily life. By embracing our emotions and accepting them with grace, we enter a world of self-discovery and growth that enriches our lives in profound ways. So, the next time you find yourself grappling with difficult emotions, remember that you don't need fixing – try sitting with your feelings until you are ready to accept them. Let this practice be your guide to greater emotional awareness, resilience and self-love.

Storytelling is a powerful tool for healing because it allows people to reclaim their narratives, process emotions, and make meaning out of difficult experiences . When we tell our stories—whether through writing, speaking, art, or movement—we engage with our past in a way that can transform pain into growth . How Storytelling and Writing Supports Healing 🌀 Reframing the Narrative Shifting from “I am broken” to “I have survived and grown” Moving from a victim mindset to an empowered perspective Recognising patterns and making conscious choices moving forward 💬 Externalising Pain Putting emotions into words helps regulate them (like in therapy) Distancing from traumatic events without suppressing them Turning shame into self-compassion through self-expression 🎭 Accessing the Subconscious Writing, art and movement can reveal unconscious beliefs Metaphor and symbolism help us explore what feels unspeakable Dreamwork, myths and archetypes can connect personal pain to universal themes 🤝 Finding Community & Connection Sharing stories reduces isolation and shame Seeing others with similar experiences fosters validation and support Collective storytelling (in groups, memoirs, social movements) creates change Methods of Storytelling for Healing ✍️ Journaling & Expressive Writing Freewriting about emotions (stream of consciousness) Writing letters to past/future selves or to people who hurt you (particularly if unsent) "Rewriting" a traumatic experience with a new, empowered perspective 🎭 Creative Arts Therapy Creating visual art, music or dance to express feelings beyond words Using drama or roleplay to step into different parts of a story Exploring myths, fairy tales, or personal symbols as metaphors for healing 📖 Memoir & Personal Narrative Writing Writing a life story with themes of resilience and transformation Exploring different perspectives of the same event to gain insight Writing as if a wiser, compassionate self were narrating your journey 🌙 Dreamwork & Mythology Looking at personal dreams for hidden wisdom Finding personal meaning in ancient myths, folktales, and archetypes Using storytelling to connect personal struggles to larger human experiences Let’s do a storytelling exercise designed to help you reframe a difficult experience  with more self-compassion, strength, and meaning . Exercise: The Hero’s Journey Rewrite This exercise is inspired by the classic Hero’s Journey  framework, which shows how struggles can lead to transformation. You’ll be writing a short story where you are the protagonist  moving through a challenge and coming out stronger. Step 1: Choose Your Story Think of a personal experience that was painful, confusing or difficult. It can be: A time you felt lost, rejected or misunderstood A relationship struggle or heartbreak A moment of failure or self-doubt A trauma or hardship that shaped you 💡 If it's too painful to write as yourself, you can write as a fictional character or use metaphor (e.g., a traveller lost in the woods, a phoenix rising from ashes). Step 2: Write Your Hero’s Journey Here’s a simple structure to follow: 1️⃣ The Ordinary World:  Who were you before the challenge? Describe your world before things changed.2️⃣ The Call to Adventure:  What event shook things up? What struggle began?3️⃣ The Dark Night:  What was the hardest part? What emotions did you face?4️⃣ The Turning Point:  What helped you shift? (Insight, support, realisation, inner strength?)5️⃣ The Return & Growth:  How are you different now? What wisdom or strength did you gain? Step 3: Reflect & Reframe After writing, ask yourself: What parts of my story show resilience, even if I didn’t see it before? How can I honour my growth instead of just the pain? If I met the past version of myself in this story, what would I say to them?